Individual and Organizational Transformation

I have recently purchased two books: Leading from the Emerging Future by Otto Scharmer and Katrin Kaufer and Leap of Perception by Penney Peirce. They go beautifully together although I cannot imagine two authors with less in common. Peirce is an intuitive expert, emphasizing the internal integration of the individual within their various spheres and arenas. Scharmer is a German MIT nerd/European intellectual. His emphasis is on systems and making them work for the benefit of all. Both authors are system-oriented and both show the way forward to the individual’s and various systems’ next necessary phase. Both reference Jon Kabat-Zinn.

 I want to be part of humanity’s next phase. Perhaps I will be, by default. However, I want to do it consciously and deliberately. With my MBA in Strategic Management, I believe I could help at least one organization to move forward. Humanity needs what I can offer.

But I feel like I’ve been underwater for the past few years. When I started school again, I wanted to spend my time digging deeply into myself and transforming myself into someone more confident. Barry got cancer. I continued school. School ended this past December. The cancer is gone, as far as we know. The Huntington’s is still progressing. And I am still submerged. It’s been difficult to not work, after spending so much time and money developing various skills, but I’m doing it for Barry. Part of me wants to shout, “Can I come up for air now?”

And so I try to integrate my knowledge into all parts of my life, live in the present, and become the embodiment of my values. To me, transformation is about being different, not just cosmetic changes. I’m tearing down and rebuilding myself altogether, not just painting the front door. I want to be part of the solution, not the problem.



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About cdhoagpurple

I have an MBA, am married to a GM/UAW retiree with Huntington's Disease. I am more Buddhist than Christian. I plan on moving to Virginia when widowed. I have a friend''s parents that live down there and another friend living in Maryland. I am simplifying my life in preparation for the eventual move.Eight years ago, my husband had stage 4 cancer. I am truly "neither here nor there." My identity shifts and I am always surprised where I end up. 2015 was my hardest year ever. This is my Dark Night of the Soul. Welcome to it.

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