Freedom from Myself
I’ve been intently interested in the concept of “freedom” lately, especially since I am leaving my church in a couple weeks. Researching the concept from a Buddhist perspective always comes back to the idea of “freedom from oneself.” Given the political upheaval of the shutdown, I have been greatly gratified by the resolution, both the substance of the solution and the timeliness of it. That has made equanimity and emotional simplicity elusive.
I need to practice more zazen. I don’t want to live as a slave of my emotions, even good ones, anymore. I don’t want to become like my mother, a common sentiment, I suppose. My mother is very conservative politically and in climate change denial. Feeling like I am gloating puts me on a level playing field with her. Ugh. It’s a side of me that I am not proud of.
I want freedom from greed, anger, and delusion, the three poisons. Any other “freedom” is more illusory than real.