“Buddhism is a process of discovery, not a list of principles. There is no book of Buddhist principles. Buddhism is about realization. It is about transformation of consciousness. It means throwing everything out, including Buddhism, and going very deep within yourself to find the foundations of your life. And once you have done that, to learn to live your life out of that which has been realized—not what you’ve been told you should or shouldn’t do.” Wisdom Seeking Wisdom, Dharma Discourse by John Daido Loori Roshi, True Dharma Eye, Case 24, Xuansha Hears the Sound of a Swallow


I’ve learned (the hard way, of course) over the years that very few people are willing to “go deep” within themselves to find the foundations of their lives. We want a ready-made foundation. Religions claim to provide that. The problem is that they are someone else’s foundation, oftentimes based on long-dead cultures.

 Today was my last Sunday of church attendance. It seemed fitting that it was “Oxi” day, when the Greeks said no to something in the past. I don’t recall, let alone care, what that may be. Today, I said “oxi” to their traditions and the attitude of “that’s just the way we have always done things.”

 To dig deep to find your own foundation is to say, “Your foundation is not mine. Your traditions are not mine.” It is deeply insulting to those who believe they have the unique, universal answer to people’s spiritual questions.

 I still know nothing. I possess no knowledge. I expect honesty and transparency. I can’t not ask questions. At this point, these few things are enough to disqualify me from ever being an orthodox Christian again.





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About cdhoagpurple

I have an MBA, am married to a GM/UAW retiree with Huntington's Disease. I am more Buddhist than Christian. I plan on moving to Virginia when widowed. I have a friend''s parents that live down there and another friend living in Maryland. I am simplifying my life in preparation for the eventual move.Eight years ago, my husband had stage 4 cancer. I am truly "neither here nor there." My identity shifts and I am always surprised where I end up. 2015 was my hardest year ever. This is my Dark Night of the Soul. Welcome to it.

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