Angel Hosting

For the past few days, I’ve been hosting angels in my home. I know it sounds new-age-y, but I can feel some differences. While that sounds hokey (and maybe it is), it has shifted some things.

For one thing, I’ve had to have a candle lit whenever I am home. Watching a candle burn down has created a sense of urgency that I haven’t been feeling of late. I think it’s hard to feel urgency when everything is the same, day after day. That’s how things have been feeling for a while. No school and no job, just taking care of Barry day after day, with our little routine. But seeing the candle burn down is a visual reminder. Is this what I want to be doing with my life?

Also, candles create a sense of holiness that I was surprised to find at home. I am accustomed to candles in an Orthodox church creating an atmosphere of holiness surrounded by icons. Now I know it works at home, too. No iconography required.

I also feel like I’ve had more patience for the past few days. Barry had a hard time at the chiropractor’s office, being impatient and antsy. He had me take him to leave and then changed his mind and we went back. This will probably be the last time they try to x-ray him. None of it really bothered me.

I feel like my life is taking a different turn. I don’t know what’s happening, but I’m okay with it.

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About cdhoagpurple

I have an MBA, am married to a GM/UAW retiree with Huntington's Disease. I am more Buddhist than Christian. I plan on moving to Virginia when widowed. I have a friend''s parents that live down there and another friend living in Maryland. I am simplifying my life in preparation for the eventual move.Eight years ago, my husband had stage 4 cancer. I am truly "neither here nor there." My identity shifts and I am always surprised where I end up. 2015 was my hardest year ever. This is my Dark Night of the Soul. Welcome to it.

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