Watching a Candle

Just watching a candle burn down is a reminder of mortality. Amazing what electricity does to your consciousness: makes death less real somehow. People used to have a saying I liked: “We’re burning daylight”; in other words, let’s get moving. You only had so many hours of light, especially in the winter, or you had a ton of things to do within one day, in the summer. Now we act like we have all the time in the world to get things done. What a fantasy.

How you spend your days is important. I have to remind myself of that sometimes, especially now, taking care of Barry and shoveling everyday. Sometimes nothing ever seems to change and then, suddenly, things start changing way too fast.

I would like to be like the candle: burning steadily and accomplishing its goal without interruption.


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About cdhoagpurple

I have an MBA, am married to a GM/UAW retiree with Huntington's Disease. I am more Buddhist than Christian. I plan on moving to Virginia when widowed. I have a friend''s parents that live down there and another friend living in Maryland. I am simplifying my life in preparation for the eventual move.Eight years ago, my husband had stage 4 cancer. I am truly "neither here nor there." My identity shifts and I am always surprised where I end up. 2015 was my hardest year ever. This is my Dark Night of the Soul. Welcome to it.

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