“We also see that mental proliferation has a solidifying effect on it; it makes aversion into something much more solid. But the more we contemplate proliferation, the less powerful it is. This change of relationship has a specific word in Pali,nibbida, which means `getting happily tired of something we’ve been doing to ourselves’ for years, decades, desperately and ignorantly, and not only to ourselves. Another way of translating nibbida is `serene disenchantment’, with the emphasis being on `serene’. It’s a situation in which we’re not drawn any more to fanning the flames, to fuelling the aversion. Whenever we catch ourselves about to do these things, we tend to drop it more and more.” The Pain of Attachment, by Corrado Pensa, Posted on 26 December 2012 by Buddhism Now
Nibbida sounds fascinating, like a form of what I might call “equanimous disgust.” It sounds like a joy in dropping dysfunctional behavior. It is what everyone hopes quitting an addiction will be like, but seldom is. It sounds like what an addict can feel like, once the physical withdrawal symptoms subside and has been in recovery for years.
I believe this state comes from meditation, which is just the continual letting go of mind and body. It’s emotional simplification, the mind and body equivalent of de-cluttering, an acknowledgment that the things we have been previously cherishing are truly worthless. This is emotional cleansing at its finest.