Change Agent

A theme keeps presenting itself to me: change. I get frustrated with people who would rather die than change. I am fascinated by the Tao of change, return, and stillness. In addition, having an MBA, I was continually told that I was a “leader.” What is a leader other than someone that inspires others to make necessary changes? You have to lead people somewhere.

The more I’ve gotten into Buddhism, the more central the whole change theme has become. It turns out that there are six or eight different bardos (“bardo” translates for the Tibetan into “between two”). Bardos are transitional by nature and there is a bardo for every state, meaning that we are all transitioning from one thing to another.

Then I look around and see people resisting change from every direction and even questioning my right to change. Change is not a right; it is inevitable. There is no option of not changing. You can only change for better or worse. I am not asserting a right to change; I am barely keeping up with the changes being demanded of me, and not even doing a great job of that.

I find myself intrigued with the idea of Buddhist hospice. Robert Chodo Campbell is very interesting to learn about. Hospice is all about offering compassion and guidance to the person transitioning from this life to the next stage, whatever that may be.

I have tutored in the past. I love helping students get to the next level math-wise. Maybe that is a form of leadership. I’m not sure.

How do I leave Michigan and lead people? I am not outgoing. I would rather be behind the scenes. Is there some unique role that I would be particularly good at? I completely understand the feeling of not wanting to change, but lack patience with people trying to avoid the unavoidable. You don’t want to change? I totally understand, but we are not being given the option to say “no.” When do you simply walk away from people determined not to learn or grow or even survive?


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About cdhoagpurple

I have an MBA, am married to a GM/UAW retiree with Huntington's Disease. I am more Buddhist than Christian. I plan on moving to Virginia when widowed. I have a friend''s parents that live down there and another friend living in Maryland. I am simplifying my life in preparation for the eventual move.Eight years ago, my husband had stage 4 cancer. I am truly "neither here nor there." My identity shifts and I am always surprised where I end up. 2015 was my hardest year ever. This is my Dark Night of the Soul. Welcome to it.

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