Daily Prompt 3/30/14

Have you got a code you live by? What are the principles or set of values you actively apply in your life?

I try to “do no harm” as much as possible. I wish I always knew what that meant. Things that seem like good ideas at the time may do the most harm in the long run.

I have tried to apply the principle in organizations I belong to, especially churches. I have tried to speak up as kindly as possible when I felt it was necessary. When I am ignored, I quietly disengage myself from such situations and, eventually, organizations. They are then on their own. I am not in the business of making people listen, but I am also no martyr. After I warn of a particular situation, I will take steps to protect myself legally, emotionally, and, especially, financially. I do not take responsibility for others’ behavior. 

If I can’t contribute, learn something, or have fun in an organization, it is time to leave.

I listen as closely as possible to what others are saying. Often, if you just listen, you can become almost semi-psychic as to what will happen next. Everyone has free will. Peons recognize this; people in power, not so much. People in charge are usually the last to know anything of real value because of their egos. People on the lower rungs of the ladder carefully edit what they tell the higher-ups, in order to not displease those who can fire/excommunicate them. This guarantees that those at the top generally do not have access to any truly useful information. All of this comes about from an unwillingness to listen to the feelings and concerns of others. People at the bottom simply allow the organization to fade away into obscurity because it only serves the needs of those at the top and is not worthy of any further time and financial investment.

Oftentimes, people have really basic needs that can be met without a huge commitment of time or resources. For example, I have a friend moving out of Michigan. She will need to clear out her house. But first, she needs to take her food to Maryland. Her food is downstairs. I am slowly taking her food from her basement and putting it on her dining room table. This will save her a lot of time. She has a new job down there. When she does come up, she has a lot of loose ends to tie up. What I am doing is small and costs me only the gas money to her house. People’s needs can be so basic. I am not rich. I don’t have a lot of money right now, but I do have time and am local to her Michigan house. And I already have keys.

I try not to create problems. I try to openly address what I see. I protect myself. And I listen.

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About cdhoagpurple

I live in Michigan. I was Greek Orthodox (and previously Protestant), but now am more Buddhist than anything. I am single now (through the till-death-do-you-part clause of the marriage contract). My husband Barry was a good man and celebrated 30 years in AA. I am overly educated, with an MBA. My life felt terminally in-limbo while caring for a sick husband, but I am free now. I see all things as being in transition. Impermanence is the ultimate fact of life. Nothing remains the same, good or bad.

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