Continuous Metamorphosis

Continual Metamorphosis

I live in a world that is changing continuously. I am doing so as well. I like the saying “change is mandatory; transformation is optional.” All of my frustrations come from things changing (going downhill) or not changing. How do you create change for the better?

Talking to my god sister this past Sunday, she said that the church now had a basket next to the pile of bulletins labelled “suggested donation: $1”. To me this is a sure sign of a dying church. I have never heard of expecting a dollar for a bulletin. They have crossed a line. They are circling the drain. Any church that cannot even give away a bulletin without the social pressure for financial remuneration is not long for this world. I laugh at the absurdity of the situation and grieve that nobody had the common sense or the cojones to stand up and say, “This is inappropriate and shameful for a church. It is simply too embarrassing to be part of this congregation any longer.” However, those with the ability to stand up for themselves (those with a shred of self-respect) were driven away by the priest years ago, myself included. A milquetoast congregation is DOA. I doubt they last another five years. My god sister was livid. “What are they going to do next? Charge us for using the bathroom?” I said, “Don’t be shocked if they do.”

My question in life is how to help individuals and businesses to change for the better, even as I and they change continuously. I feel like the world is slippery. I can have a goal and then life can completely obliterate it.

I feel like an entirely new world is being born. How do I midwife this new world? What role can I play? How hard should people try to save organizations intent on preserving a worthless status quo? Young people are walking away from churches in record numbers, for the reasons I have been whining about for years. The difference between them and myself is that I have wasted so many years of my life trying to get comfortable people to listen to me, whereas the young don’t even bother. They are so much smarter than I ever was.

What makes me different than today’s young people is that I am in between them and my parents age-wise. I see where the older folks are coming from. I feel a little sad not to have seen the world they still live in in their minds. It sounds like a slower, saner world. I also see where the younger people are coming from. Older people want younger ones to “pay their dues” in order to receive such essentials as vacations and flex-time. Such a demand strikes the younger generation as ridiculous because younger people do not see themselves as ever collecting Social Security. They either get these “goodies” now or take their knowledge, skills, and abilities where others will appreciate them. End of discussion. I have spent far too long trying to get the elderly to “understand” when they cannot relate at all. Still, I feel like being the in-between generation gives me a perspective others lack.

I believe in questions. They get the mind going in new directions. Some important questions include:

  • Do you feel the leadership here practices what they preach?
  • Is there anyone here that you admire or would like to be more like?
  • What could I do to help you become more of the person you want to be?

These questions could apply to any organization, not just churches. They cut to the heart. They clarify what the person wants and helps the individual see where the answers are and aren’t. The responses could be a wake-up call to those with ears to hear.

I want things to change for the positive, as opposed to watching places just die off while blaming everyone else for their failures. Places will change, either for the better or not. I’d like to be a catalyst for positive change. However, I have no interest in defending a status quo that serves the few at the financial and emotional expense of the many. I will not defend poisonous places. I want something better and more meaningful for my life, even if I have to invent it myself.


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About cdhoagpurple

I have an MBA, am married to a GM/UAW retiree with Huntington's Disease. I am more Buddhist than Christian. I plan on moving to Virginia when widowed. I have a friend''s parents that live down there and another friend living in Maryland. I am simplifying my life in preparation for the eventual move.Eight years ago, my husband had stage 4 cancer. I am truly "neither here nor there." My identity shifts and I am always surprised where I end up. 2015 was my hardest year ever. This is my Dark Night of the Soul. Welcome to it.

One response to “Continuous Metamorphosis”

  1. Leigh Donovan, HHC says :

    Hi cdhoagpurple… I love the way your well-developed and insightful thoughts flow right onto the page… As for your Awareness and Your Generation-Gap, you are most definitely a first wave Indigo. I am not sure how you feel about labels–they serve us, until they don’t. However, this label was helpful for me a few years ago when seeking to understand my over-sensitive highly unconventional self. Regardless of this, I would like to ask you a few things now that I have read a few of your posts:
    –> What do you do for self-care (massage, time in nature, hot sea salt baths, solo lunch outside café, manicure or pedicure, bodywork or walking?)
    –>Do you resonate with the niche of life-coaching or starting your own business?
    –>What would you like to “be when you grow up”? Do you still have dreams? Or do you have new dreams that are taking shape?

    Thank you for sharing yourself and your energy with the rest of the world here… and if you don’t already, put some thought into 3 new things you can do now to take care of YOU and make you feel good. I find that Well being, Vision, and the like, flow best in these self-care moments when the low vibes lift, if even for a few moments.

    Many Blessings-

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