Not Qualified but Who Cares?

My friend out east called me yesterday. She is having trouble with the crazy and inappropriate people she works for. She really wanted my guidance. I told her that she must remain centered regardless of how bizarre their behavior is. Keep re-centering. Keep your physical senses open. Can I feel my feet? What do I hear? I told her to do this so she wouldn’t be in her head and risk them throwing her for an emotional loop.

She is a law school graduate making $16/hour. I am unemployed. She’s looking for my counsel? Seriously?

I am not a life coach and am definitely not qualified to play the role of one. Maybe someday. But my friends seek my advice regularly. I find that fascinating.

I feel like Groucho Marx when he said that he would never join a club that would have him as a member. His membership standards were higher than his own conduct—and he knew it. I feel like my friends should have more sense than to seek career advice from someone unemployed and not even looking for a job. I am flattered and baffled.

What I have done is to stop investing emotional energy into anything. I leave the extremes alone. They are unsustainable. I need my energy to deal with practical problems and issues, not drama.

I have been reading The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. It’s good. Like most good books, it doesn’t say anything particularly new; it just says it better than most and in a way that is easily relatable. Let go of everything. Allow everything to go through you. Keep coming back to center. This is a big part of spirituality and a legitimate path in and of itself.

It’s kind of like The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. That book contained nothing new, but it was extremely well organized, easily understood, easily memorized, and very practical. It was one of the first books I was assigned to read in business school. I instantly understood why. It was the first book I ever read that made the distinction between the urgent and the important. Back when it was published, that was a new distinction. Today, it is commonplace.

If it works, it works. When that is your yardstick, things have an amazing ability to find their own level and work themselves out. I have nothing new to offer, but maybe that’s not all that important.

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About cdhoagpurple

I live in Michigan. I was Greek Orthodox (and previously Protestant), but now am more Buddhist than anything. I am single now (through the till-death-do-you-part clause of the marriage contract). My husband Barry was a good man and celebrated 30 years in AA. I am overly educated, with an MBA. My life felt terminally in-limbo while caring for a sick husband, but I am free now. I see all things as being in transition. Impermanence is the ultimate fact of life. Nothing remains the same, good or bad.

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