Manufactured Drama

I have been overwhelmed lately. Dealing with Barry’s sponsor’s impending death has created an internal emptiness I was not prepared for. Also, my computer updated itself, thereby making internet access impossible once again. I took it to the store I bought it at (because I had forgotten how to uninstall updates). They showed me how again and I also wrote down the key for my anti-virus software.

I went home and un-installed the last couple months’ worth of updates. My computer hasn’t worked this well in, well, months. I did not have a virus. I’m contemplating un-installing all the updates I can. Every last glitch has come from a Microsoft update, as near as I can tell so far. Every. Single. One. Wow.

Yesterday reminds me of a saying by a favorite Christian lady evangelist: once you’re in over your head, it doesn’t matter how deep you go. Life contains many things that a person has no control over, but much of the drama we deal with is manufactured for someone else’s profit. It can take some thought and discernment to figure out how much in life is inevitable versus how much we can avoid simply by making more conscious choices (like driving less when gas prices spike, or taking public transportation).

This is where simplifying one’s life clarifies issues. Getting rid of stuff has made my real needs so much more obvious. I can look at problems and see what I can and can’t do. Death? Not much I can change about that. Computer questions? Go to Staples. Too many commitments? Do some cancelling. Spider webs in hard to reach areas? Where’s the broom?

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About cdhoagpurple

I live in Michigan. I was Greek Orthodox (and previously Protestant), but now am more Buddhist than anything. I am single now (through the till-death-do-you-part clause of the marriage contract). My husband Barry was a good man and celebrated 30 years in AA. I am overly educated, with an MBA. My life felt terminally in-limbo while caring for a sick husband, but I am free now. I see all things as being in transition. Impermanence is the ultimate fact of life. Nothing remains the same, good or bad.

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