Dysfunctioning for Two

I was wondering why there had not been much more movement on selling the house. I found out why. I came home last night from grocery shopping to a message from my realtor.

It’s a POA issue. My realtor explained that the mortgage company wanted to update my general durable POA for Barry. Not many things can make me both confused and livid all at the same time, but this did it. How do you “update” something that is permanent and supposed to last forever? Also, they wanted to see the original POA.

I could only think of one real solution: do it again. So I started looking online for general durable Michigan POA forms and found one and downloaded it. I asked my parents if they would both be witnesses and they said yes. I arranged for us to meet at FedEx Office today so I could get it notarized, only to find out last night that they no longer offer notary services. Last night I printed out the form. This morning I called the UPS Store and asked when the notary would be in and they said all day.

Then my realtor called. She explained that I did not need to get a new one and that the mortgage company would somehow help to get my current POA registered at the county courthouse. That could actually be helpful. Also, if she needed Barry’s signature, she would come over after calling us. I asked if it would be more helpful or complicating to follow through with my plan to do it all again and she said it would complicate things. So I cancelled my parents.

Finding the “original” POA is no small feat. I have several copies and cannot tell which is the original. I had it printed in lack-and-white, the pen used to sign was black, and the notary’s stamp was black. I have no idea which one is the original. My plan for doing it today was to use various colored pens for the signatures. That way, when it would be copied in black and white, I would know which was the original. Back in 2008, such a thought never occurred to me.

This is not the first POA issue I’ve had. A little more than a year ago, Sallie Mae tried to tell me that my POA had expired because the notary’s commission had expired in 2013. I had a heated discussion with them. “Look up the word ‘durable.’ It never expires! I cannot get a new POA every time a notary’s commission expires. This is insane.”

Then there would be the issue of the validity of any new POA. The person is basically declaring themselves to be of sound mind. Barry knew exactly what he was doing in 2008. Today? Not so much. It would be easily defeated in court today. Barry would sign anything for me today, if it will put me in a better mood.

The reason for my sullen mood is that I am totally responsible for everything and don’t always know what I am doing! I am expected to make bricks without straw. I am fully accountable without the necessary tools to do an adequate job. I am trying to function for two without sufficient knowledge for one.

My realtor basically had to talk me off the ledge. I told her that I will do anything to make this house sale happen and that I don’t want the buyers thinking I am holding up the process. Part of the mortgage company’s concern is to make sure there are no liens on the property or anything like that. If it takes Barry’s signature, fine. Barry and I own this house, along with the mortgage company. There are no past-due back taxes or anything similar. Just tell me how much money to bring to closing to pay off my mortgage and we will make this happen.

I just thank God for my parents’ willingness to help.

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About cdhoagpurple

I live in Michigan. I was Greek Orthodox (and previously Protestant), but now am more Buddhist than anything. I am single now (through the till-death-do-you-part clause of the marriage contract). My husband Barry was a good man and celebrated 30 years in AA. I am overly educated, with an MBA. My life felt terminally in-limbo while caring for a sick husband, but I am free now. I see all things as being in transition. Impermanence is the ultimate fact of life. Nothing remains the same, good or bad.

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