Spiritual Home

Something happened last night. I went to a different location for the blessing, the house of a woman visiting her daughter in California. The house had a peace I haven’t felt since I-don’t-know-when. Frankly, it radiated a warmth, love, and acceptance I have never felt in any church anywhere. While there, I thought, “Wow. There is so much healing and loving we can do before death.”

I still need help in cleaning my house, but I have found my inspiration. I have been looking inspiration for some time now. I hadn’t even known what I’d been looking for. That peace is available. With Barry’s sponsor’s death and the drama going on all around me, I have been just coping for a while.  I had forgotten that peace existed. I doubt that I’ll ever be willing to live without it again. It’s one of those things that, once you get a taste, you can never pretend you never tasted. It was like going home emotionally and spiritually. No matter how bad things get, I know that this state is accessible. It can never not be there. It never went anywhere. I just got lost.

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About cdhoagpurple

I have an MBA, am married to a GM/UAW retiree with Huntington's Disease. I am more Buddhist than Christian. I plan on moving to Virginia when widowed. I have a friend''s parents that live down there and another friend living in Maryland. I am simplifying my life in preparation for the eventual move.Eight years ago, my husband had stage 4 cancer. I am truly "neither here nor there." My identity shifts and I am always surprised where I end up. 2015 was my hardest year ever. This is my Dark Night of the Soul. Welcome to it.

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